Let Go of Being Right

Human beings are perhaps never more frightening than when they are convinced beyond doubt that they are right. ~ Laurens van der Post ~

Have you ever ruined a conversation, a meeting, a party or worse, a relationship because it was so important to be right?  So many arguments over things that really didn't matter! Reflect back and remember the times when you could've have just let it go.  There are cases when being right is the difference between life and death - literally.  But, how often does that really happen?  Also, consider how frequent your arguments are about opinions and not even facts!  Mindful leaders can determine when they are arguing opinion and when they are arguing fact, which one is life or death and then choosing wisely which argument to pursue or not pursue.  Take the time to determine which is more important - relationship building or being right. There are times to be right but most often it is more important to keep the relationship right. 

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

I will carefully pick my battles.


 

Apologize to Mend, Improve, Bond

An apology is the superglue of life. It can repair just about anything. ~Lynn Johnston

Even though you are a leader, you will not be perfect.  You will say the wrong thing, make the wrong decision or make a careless mistake.  Making mistakes followed by a sincere apology makes you stronger because it allows people to move on from the hurt and begin to start a discussion on improvement or repairing. Even if you don't think you did anything wrong but there is something amis start with an apology.  The focus is then taken away from any pain onto "what happened and how does this not happen again?"  When others see you, the leader, want to right wrongs they will feel a strong bond and willingness to follow.

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

"I will apologize with sincerity to mend, improve, and bond."

Listen With a Kind Heart

To be kind is sometimes more important than to be right. Many times, what people need is not a brilliant mind that speaks but, a special heart that listens. ~ Unknown

If you want to be a leader just to show others how smart you are then you are not a leader but a small person who needs to build confidence.  I always teach in my leadership, conflict and customer service courses that a sure fire way too get others to believe you in you, is to let go of being right all the time.  Becoming a leader is all about relationship building.  Relationship building is not about showing how smart you are or how you might be the best.  It's about how can you make the other person feel like the best.   In conflict, pick your battles.  It isn't necessary to always win but it is necessary to make the other person feel important and special. 

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

"I will set aside my need to be right and show true leadership by listening with a kind heart."