Be A Pain

In giving advice seek to help, not to please, your friend.  ~ Solon ~

When you give advice and feedback, ensure that you are being honest and upfront.  It's OK to tread lightly so you don't hurt esteem, however, watch out.  When you soften your feedback or advice the seriousness could get lost.  Your help as a leader should never be harmful but it is sometimes painful.  However, you can be tough and caring at the same time.  Just know that your help is caring and remember, the other person's perception of caring is all in the delivery and the support.

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:


I give caring, honest and helpful feedback.

What do you attract?

Good fortune shies away from gloom. Keep your spirits up. Good things will come to you and you will come to good things. ~Terri Guillemets

You attract what you are. Negative begets negativity.  Even if you are  the most optimistic person there will be times when negativity will find a path into your soul.  When those around you are infected it's hard to stay healthy.  You have to find a way stay mindful and practice positivity even when you don't feel like it.  When you are leading - be honest when times are tough and show your team how to turn around an attitude.   Lift the fog for them with the truth and with the possibilities.  Be a role model - if you hang your head then others will, too.  If you lift your head to the sun, then others will, too.

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

I am positive, to attract good fortunes.

Avoid the Flames

If you treat every situation as a life-and-death matter, you'll die a lot of times. ~ Dean Smith ~

As a leader you can't be a firefighter and treat everything like a fire that must be put out immediately.  If you do this, then you'll never solve problems.  When you are in firefighter mode, all you want is to do is douse the flames.  When you run around and behave as if everything is an emergency then your team will do the same.  Imagine the stress and wasted energy.  Instead become the investigator that finds the root cause.  Be strategic so that you solve problems to the point of no return.  Prioritize!  Choose what needs a quick fix that you can return to later.  Take your time on the really important stuff.  Otherwise...pardon the pun...you will burn out.

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

"I am calm and thoughtful in my planning and actions."

Shut your mind up!

The word 'listen' contains the same letters as the word 'silent'. ~ Alfred Brendel ~

The best way to listen is to not only silence your mouth but silence your mind.  You often let your own biases and agenda keep you from listening. How do you develop as a leader if you are never silent around your those that lead.  Next time someone has something to say, shut down your feelings and open up.  In addition, don't always contribute...ask questions instead. You can't truely listen if you are too busy prepping in your mind what you want to say.

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

"I quiet my own thoughts when someone is talking."

Strong Leaders Don't Make Weak Apologies

A stiff apology is a second insult.... The injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt. ~G.K. Chesterton~

None one is perfect.  You will make mistakes.  When it effects other people an apology is the first step to mending any wrong.   You should heal the insult, even when you don't believe it was an insult.  It's about the other person, not you.  You must be authentic in caring about how you make others feel.  Apologies are even important to people you don't know that well because it speaks to character.   It is a way for people to not have the wrong impression about you.  If you give in inauthentic apology then people will see a flawed leader.  Give a sincere apology after a mistake then people will look past the flaw and see a noble leader.

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

"I am a stronger leader when I give sincere apologies."

Do Something…Anything

Fake it till you become it.  ~ Amy Cuddy ~

Some days you just don't feel it.  Try.  Try, anyway.  Even if it's just a little effort, don't slack off.  Be honest with yourself and then lie to yourself.  Tell yourself that you are engaged -  just do something because people are counting on you.  You can have an off day - just don't show it to the world.  Have a confidant because you might need someone to vent to but leave it at that and go change the world...even if you don't feel like it today.

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

"I make myself feel more engaged."

"Busy" Doesn't Always Cut It

Don't mistake activity with achievement. ~ John Wooden ~

Treading water is certainly a form of swimming but it'll never win you a gold medal in a relay race.  You work hard.  It's true.  But just because you are busy at work, it doesn't mean you are accomplishing anything.  First, are you working on the things that matter?  Second, are you easily distracted when working on important tasks? Finally, is it more important to check off a to-do list or more important to have solved an critical problem? 

Ask yourself at the end of each day.  "What have I accomplished?"  Don't think in terms of tasks completed but rather what propelled you forward in the achievement of goals.  As a leader, never get fooled by your "busy" workers.  Ask them the same question.  "What did you accomplish today?"  Then: "How did that help us move toward our desired results?"

1. Close your eyes
2. Breathe
3. Empty your mind
4. As thoughts come in, acknowledge and whisk them away
5. Focus on your breathing
6. Think about the affirmation:

"I'm busy on the tasks that will help me succeed."